He's killing stars for me
by FallingNarwhals
Summary: The first thing they did to Matthew Holt was pierce his lip with a tiny metal stud. It didn't hurt, it was like getting a piercing back on earth. Matt had gotten a small hole in his ear back on earth, and it was eerily similar to the one on his lip. Shatt, post-kerberos


The first thing they did to Matthew Holt was pierce his lip with a tiny metal stud.

It didn't hurt, it was like getting a piercing back on earth. Matt had gotten a small hole in his ear back on earth, and it was eerily similar to the one on his lip.

The yellow-one-eyed aliens that called themselves the Makta said they were translators. The ships had universal translators but the ancient Altean technology didn't allow for individuals to have such power. So the galra made these things that capture the waves from a nearby ship and as a result, mini universal translator.

The orange-many-limbed ones said they were tracking devices that exploded the moment they didn't touch flesh. So Matt took the piercing out, and laid it on the ground.

He supposed it was an act of rebellion as the prisoners cowered in the corner of their cell, and the Makta simply looked on without fear. Matt was feeling particularly cocky right then, ready to burst the bars of their cell down and take the nearest guard station and cause a rebellion. Why give the prisoners something explosive and they were expected not to use it?

He counted to ten. The piercing did not explode. He placed the stud in his ear rather than the bleeding hole in his lip. Best place it in a healthy and healed hole rather than one that'll get infected later.

(He didn't want to think about he gotten the first peircing, that Kashi had an identical one after getting absolutely shit-faced one night after he became a higher-up, that they both wore dangle earrings to the ceremony and they looked stunning.)

He decided that the orange-many-limbs were full of shit.

Despite the howlings of the full-of-shit ones (thats what he's going to call them now. They didn't need a formal name) he managed to sit next to his father and close his eyes.

You don't sleep often in galra imprisonment.

.

..

…

It's hard to sleep in a Galra imprisonment.

Kashi would be strong, would stay strong for Matt and his father if he were with them.

If Kashi were here, he would wrap his strong arms around Matt and press him close. If Kashi were here, he'll make sure Matt and Sam were safe while they slept. Poor guy probably hasn't slept since Kerberos.

Well. He can sleep as much as he wants now.

Takashi Shirogane was dead. And if he wasn't dead yet, he will be soon. His death could be pinned on Matt if you squint hard enough.

(Matt just blamed himself. If he hadn't been fearing for his life then maybe Kashi wouldn't have sliced his knee open, sending Matt back to his father and Kashi to his death.)

When they shoved Matt into the holding cell with a gaping wound with lazy bandages on, a tiny bleeding hole in his lip, his dad had asked where Shiro was.

"Matt, please. Where did they take Shiro?"

He could only shake his head, Shiro's warm eyes and expression, like he'd kill every star and he'll do it again for him, permanently etched in his brain.

"Where's Shriogane, Matt?"

 _He killed himself for me._

"Matt, please!"

Samuel Holt was shaking his shoulders now, forcing Matt to look into his father's eyes.

"Where is Takashi Shirogane, Matt?" His voice was firm, demanding. Matt was oddly reminded of the time he set a small fire in the kitchen and Sam asked who had started it.

"He's killing stars for me." It was a logical answer. Kashi will snuff out the bright suns in every galaxy if it was to save him.

Sam, with shaky old and stiff hands that were worn with weeks of the galra inprisonment, let go of Matt's shoulders and began undoing the knots on his bandaged leg. It didn't even sting anymore.

That was odd.

.

..

…

It was quite odd.

He wasn't aware that there were so many stars in the universe.

Past the light-polluted space of Goldilocks area and beyond Neptune's orbit, the stars shined brighter then Matt had ever imagined. Out here there were no shooting stars or space junk or random bits of ancient satellites. There was only space and stars and emptiness just waiting to be discovered.

They were sharing a bed. Galaxy Garrison regulations didn't allow for romantic acts onboard regardless of your relationship status, but Sam Holt didn't mind as long as they wouldn't do anything that can't be in a disney movie.

That was Sam's own way of saying "don't have sex on my damn ship."

(Not that they would anyway. He's content to just sleepy cuddling his beloved, and stealing small kisses and just existing together.)

They had a window, two feet thick of glass and several metal seals that'll keep an entire fleet of space debris from scratching it. It was necessary to have one, you can't simply rely on data feeds to fly a rocket.

And Matt could see it now, the infinitely clear cosmos stretching out beyond their tiny haven, the blanket bunched up around their shoulders and their socked feet poking out of the thin sheets. The pod designed to get them to Kerberos was climate controlled, and there was no need for any excess warmth.

But damnit, he was a man that loved being comfortable in his down time. And Kashi's chest was warm though the thin shirt, thick arms wrapped around his torso and Kashi's soft breathing comforting on his neck.

It was just him, Takashi Shirogane, and the beautiful vastness of space just stretched out before them, and that was all Matthew Holt really needed.

"I was thinking," Kashi started, breaking the not-silence that tended to fill their downtime when they were together. "Hypothetically thinking. If I was a god, and for some reason another god kidnapped you. And the ransom was to kill every star in the universe to get you back," Kashi paused. "I'll do it."

"That's dumb, Shirogane. Hypothetically speaking, if you were a god and I was a mere mortal that you fell in love with, then you'll would have put out every star in the universe just to keep me alive for thirty odd years after that, assuming my kidnapper didn't fatally wound me." Matt replied instantly.

"I'll still do it." Kashi admitted. "I'll put out every light in the galaxy and kill all the stars in the universe if just to see you one last time."

.

..

…

"He'll see me again."

"He's killing stars for me."

"I love him."

Matt liked to talk about Takashi Shirogane a lot. He'll talk while they're working in the freezing mineshafts of sunless planets, blabber on about their high school days, their dates on earth, that mole just behind his ear, the way how he would wrap his protective arms around Matt and make him feel safe, like nothing in the entire known universe could go wrong when they're together.

He didn't notice when he fell silent, the words forming in his head but never coming out of his mouth. They vibrated under his tongue, made his upper back tingle in anxiety, put him on edge and yet he never seemed to realize that he hasn't spoken a word since that fated day where Takashi Shirogane sliced his knee open to save his life.

He communicated in small gestures, movement of the eyes and twitches of the fingers that gave away every emotion if you knew how to look.

The Makta understood him quite well and knew he was aching, in a way that massaging the knots out of muscle could never cure. The Makta explained that when three Makta bonded and one was taken away or died, their brain chemistry would become unbalanced and the pain is seemingly unbearable on paper. They could relate to Matt losing Shiro, even if they seemed put off by Matt only having one "person."

Polyromantic one eyed yellow aliens. God bless them. They probably kept Sam and Matt sane. They seemed to be the only species that were just as social as humans, and the only ones willing to touch Sam and Matt in a comforting way, even if it's just a shifting of a hand onto Matt's shoulder.

It was the softest touch they all received in galra imprisonment.

In galra imprisonment, you don't get hugs or reassuring notions often. So you savor every bit.


End file.
